Day 123That is right! It is official. I am one third the way to my goal. On the one hand, I can't believe I have written 122 posts! On the other hand, I can't believe I have 245 left to go! That seems really overwhelming. I will have to write posts over the holidays and over February vacation when I'll be on a ski vacation. What was I thinking?
The bigger question is: Is this worthwhile? The sad answer is: I have no idea. You would think, 122 posts in, I'd be feeling some of the rewards of this reflection. I really don't know if it is impacting my practice all that much. I have definitely read more as sometimes, I need some inspiration. I definitely think that the blog has forced me to pause and reflect on the learning happening in my room. It has also forced me to take stalk of what I'm doing well and where I need to grow. I'm just not sure it is making any real difference. I do know that sometimes it kills me to write these posts. At least it does initially. There aren't all that many occasions when I'm jonesing to come home at the end of the day, feed my family, run my kids around to their extra curricular, do my planning, my grading, communicate with parents, clean my house, and wrap up whatever chores or errands I have, and THEN sit down to write. However, once I get going, once the first few sentences are down, the writing generally flows. What is worth noting is that when you're writing with no audience there is less stress. I do proofread. So often though, I'm writing late at night and the proofreading, bleary-eyed and all, is fairly useless. Whenever I revisit older posts, I find a plethora of errors. I've had to let that go. Generally, I tend to be a perfectionist. I've had to let that go a little. Also, sometimes life happens, I get tired, and I fall behind. I have to give myself permission to fall behind and then somehow motivate myself to get caught up. There are times when I think, "this is it, I'm probably done." But then, for some reason, I'm able to forge ahead. My kids have been great about motivating me. They definitely aren't reading this blog but they often ask me what post I'm on or try to guess. Whenever I'm struggling to keep up, they encourage me. It really is helpful. So, I'm 1/3 the way toward reaching my goal of blogging and reflecting about my practice as a teacher for 365 days. I'm honestly not sure I'll make it to the finish line. Still, I'm proud to have made it this far.
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Marie McManus BrighamA public school teacher who gets to wonder alongside fourth-graders. Archives
December 2018
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